WIDOWHOOD AND CHILDLESSNESS

 WIDOWHOOD AND CHILDLESSNESS

by

Zwandien Bobai

Nnyeni became a widow shortly after her sons, Da‌̱wali and Zwaa‌̱khu got married to Ndi and Kuvwuon as their young wives. Di‌̱dam, her husband had been bedridden for years before his eventual demise with what appeared to be a stroke. While he was in the condition, he suffered amnesia, too.

He left the wife, Nnyeni and the young couples to fend and cater for themselves! Theirs was a context in which women did not work and young men like Da‌̱wali and Zwaa‌̱khu were not trusted with any responsibility since it was reasoned that they could not deliver. This family was left in a quagmire.

In such unbearable condition, the sons left to continue the lineage of Di‌̱dam also died after just 18 months. They had gone to farm on that fateful day to harvest sweet potatoes across the stream known as A‌̱khaak which served as the boundary between A‌̱taknjei, their village and A‌̱shonga‌̱shyui, their mother’s ancestral village. They did not know it had rained cat and dog in Gan. Unknown to Da‌̱wali and Zwaa‌̱khu, the rain had resulted in over-flooding. When they attempted crossing the stream, they drowned. After a day’s long search and rescue mission, their lifeless bodies were recovered from the Gan River.

This was how Nnyeni and her daughters’ in-law, Ndi and Kuvwuon became widows. The young widows had not borne Da‌̱wali and Zwaa‌̱khu any children. Childbearing was the major reason for marriage in A‌̱taknjei just like in other communities of A̱tyapland. The situation of these widows was quite puzzling. The villagers started accusing them of witchcraft which could be the reason why all three husbands could die within such a short period of time and interval. But the people forgot that all the men or husbands died in quite understandable circumstances. While plans for the funeral of the young men were ongoing, their wives, Ndi and Kuvwuon were forced into having their hairs barbed to symbolise their guilt even though they claimed innocence.

What was more unfortunate to these women was the lack of kinsmen who could marry them and bear children in Da‌̱wali and Zwaa‌̱khu’s names. It was traditionally accepted that when a young and married man dies without bearing children, his close relation, a brother could go into the wife and have children in the deceased’s name.

The mother in-law, Nnyeni urged her daughters’ in-law to return to their homes and wait in hope of getting husbands to remarry. Nnyeni said this because she had grown past childbearing age. She was already a sexagenarian. Subsequently, Ndi returned to Makhwakhu, her father’s village and Kuvwuon reunited with her ancestral parents at Watyap. Both of them got married and had children afterwards.

When the people of A‌̱taknjei heard about the fortunes of Ndi and Kuvwuon, they were surprised that those witches could remarry and even bear children, sons and daughters. They had written them off; the community believed nothing good could come out of them since they were accused of witchcraft. Until this day in A‌taknjei, they still ask: could a witch possibly live with a husband and not kill him to bear children at last? This is why the proverb is always used in most communities in A̱tyapland that “the witch does not allow the husband to see his offspring.”

THE END!

⚠️ This is merely a sort of fiction. However, what is narrated here could be the past or current experiences of many traditional people.😭

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